Saturday, April 14, 2007

Alex the Wild-Ass Cat Part I : The Origin

It began and ended within the hour. Sunday during breakfast, Tom notices a flyer stuck in the newspaper advertising the local animal shelter and their one-day-only adopt-a-pet extravaganza. Today. Right now. We decide to go down and pick up a cat.

The Cat that Looked Just Like Jay Leno

Not up for adoption, we discover upon inquiry.

Alex Comes Home

We lug Alex, whimpering inside his cat cage, through the garage and into the basement. We set up his new litterbox by the furnace. We decide it might be wise and probably respectful to show Alex where the bathroom is before we take him upstairs. Tom opens up the door on the top of the cage.

Alex Shows Right Stuff for Pro Basketball Career

Alex, in a feat defiant of gravity and all expectation, executes a ten-foot vertical leap. After a brief scramble on or about the ceiling, our new cat vanishes into a little hole near the ductwork. Tom and I stare at the point of disappearance. We are frozen with befuddlement.

Calling Norma at the Pound

We decide not to call Norma at the pound for help. She would probably report us to the Pet Abuse DYFUS Hotline or something. How exactly do you explain that within two minutes of bringing home your new pet, the cat has become lodged inside the wall?

(Hold on to your seat. To be continued....)

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