Tom's Head Slightly Injured during Hardcore Ape Caper

All I hear is a huge crash. Like huge. Some thrashing around and Tom shrieking like a little girl with a vile potty mouth. I sprint into the livingroom. Tom stands amidst an explosion of broken glass. Some blood trickles off his cheek at a non-fatal velocity. 

Alex the Cat hovers nearby, puffed up like one of the more gigantic Uggs spaceboots.

It all began innocently enough.

Apparently, Tom was just lushing on the sofa watching the prequel to Planet of the Apes, starring James Franco. Alex nestled on his lap, sound asleep.

Suddenly, an Ape lets out a wild Ape wail. Alex, in a singular apoplectic freakout, pops straight up in the air and lands on top of Tom's head. His claws cling to Tom's face and he perches up there like a demonic hat.

With some quick battle reflexes, Tom yanks Alex off his head. The cat lands on a glass bowl and smashes it into a million pieces.

Luckily no one was injured beyond:

•  the Lord, whose name was definitely dropped in vain, 
• the noted flesh wound, and 
• the Orrefors candy dish which I purchased at the factory in 1988.