Nudie people in the hallway

 

Empty hallways galore.
Photocredit: Lofts

Here's a revelation: Some people in our apartment building have grown very accustomed to having the place to themselves. Upon our return to Manhattan, our doorman told us that the building had been maybe 40% occupied throughout most of the hot mess that is this pandemic.

Apparently our neighbors are 40-percenters. I went out in the hallway to drop a bag down the trash chute. Apparently I wasn't the only one who decided to take out the garbage right about then. I caught the neighbor from directly across the hall from us, a zaftig middle-aged real estate agent, zipping toward me in a sheer sort of nightie. She apologized for not having a mask on and covered her face with her hands.

"Well hello, Ladies," I said cheerfully.

Ha ha, no I didn't but I thought about it.

A few hours later, Tom leaves for his run. Standing in front of the elevator is our other neighbor from down the hall. This guy has lived in the same apartment since 1988. He also is a firm advocate of 80's fashion. He looks like an Irish Freddy Mercury with the little mustache and everything.

So this guy is standing, stock still in front of the elevator wearing nothing but the tiniest tiny pair of shorts. Tom approaches the elevator and presses the button. The guy says he's waiting for the doorman to send something up in the bellcart. He rubs his bare feet together awkwardly.

They stand there side by side for a minute. Maybe two.

"How about this weather lately?" says Tom.