The Invisalign paradox of Time

'For the young the days go fast and the years go slow; for the old the days go slow and the years go fast.'
 —  Anna Quindlen 

I totally get this quote now that I have Invisaligns. And am old.

Invisalign "tray." You get a whole bunch of
them. You start from "1 of 43" (or whatever) and 
slowly level up as your teeth move.

I'd rewrite the quote though to include something about how long it seems to take to level up to the next Invisalign tray thingo and how long this whole process is going to take... But then how fast time flies after you take the damn thing out of your mouth when you are eating lunch. Or breakfast. Or day drinking. Or snacking on delicious grapes.  

There is an immediate and consequential problem with the fleeting nature of time while stuffing your face: You feel like you should wait a day or two past the appointed "time to switch the Invisalign tray" just in case you f*ed up your progress by not having the Invisaligns in for the recommended 20-24 hours a day. I mean, maybe it's possible to solve for a complete disregard for the rules by taking a remedial day or two... seems reasonable...

But seriously WTF, 22 hours a day you're supposed to have these things in your mouth? Who are these people who can manage this? What do they do, pound Ensures with Caffeine a few times a day? It can take me the full two hours to complete my three-prong morning constitutional consisting of pre-breakfast coffee, breakfast and two cups of post breakfast tea. 

I have my first check-in with the orthodontist tomorrow, so we'll see how badly I've been failing to follow directions.

oh also:

I post this here as a salute to unfettered entrepreneurial spirit: