NaBloPoMo Day 1: Be Funny not Rant-y

On a drive to New Jersey, I was doing the thing where I regale Tom, somewhat endlessly tbh, about some incident that has transpired. This time, the incident requiring endless regaling happened to be my most recent visit to the newly reopened Frick museum with my friend Bruce. 

Sidebar: Journalists and tourists have recently taken to calling the newly renovated Frick the "jewel box" of midtown.

The conservatory in the middle of the Frick Mansion.
Sure. It's very lovely even though,
according to Bruce, "it smells a little funky."

A pretty room in the "jewelbox"

And right? The place is top trim don't get me wrong. 

Yet, turns out, this multi-year, hundreds of millions of dollars remodeling triumph is nothing in the face of this fact: Bruce and I had to show our tickets three (3) times to the ticket taker.

OMG Right?! Luckily I'm a member so we skip the line, I would never go there as a non-member. I do not stand in lines. But line or no line, when we entered the joint, I had to dig around in my handbag, pull out my phone and find my membership card in my phone wallet so the ticket taker could scan my digital member card ticket. It was arduous you get my point.

After getting inside, Bruce and I beelined to the special exhibit, which was the Church of the Holy Seprechor special exhibit. 

A close up photo of a robe.
OOPS!

But you know where this special exhibit let us out? Right, BACK WHERE WE STARTED IN THE ENTRANCE LOBBY! So then we have to go back past the same ticket taker who scanned my phone wallet member card before. She remembered us and waved us through which was good because I had just put away my phone after getting scolded by the guard in the Holy Seprechor exhibit for taking a photo when there were, apparently, no photos allowed. 

Now, I saw no signs to this effect, but fine. Maybe I missed them. I'm usually pretty attentive, but sure. It's possible.

So then Bruce and I went upstairs and looked around some, mostly at the amazing porcelain flowers which ALSO HAVE NO SIGNS. 

Please note: I did not rant about the no signs situation on the porcelain flower art or otherwise to Tom. It was Bruce who mostly took umbrage on this no signs point and I had already listened to his rant about it and therefore didn't need to rehash.

But then.... Bruce and I wound up coming down these stairs which dropped us off BACK IN THE ENTRANCE LOBBY. 

The third time we walked past the same ticket taker I apologized. I was like, "I'm sorry we're doing this wrong and keep coming by here." The ticket taker said, "oh, everybody does it, no worries."

Wait what? EVERYBODY DOES IT? You'd think if everybody accidentally like some witchcraft was afoot kept winding up back in the entrance lobby somebody would do something about it. Like move the museum store either to the basement or into the semi-gigantic reference library front area, where they also could put back the coffee and beverage cart that used to be there when the museum first reopened. 

(*This suggestion to move the gift shop and put back the coffee cart which both Bruce and I vigorously debated in hoarse voices because the air is dry in the Frick and a beverage really would have been nice... it's true that neither of these suggestions would result in any fewer entrance lobby accidental visits. 

BUT SERIOUSLY: Both Bruce and I firmly agreed it was ridiculous to make prospective customers stand in a line to get in a gift shop. You're supposed to EXIT through the gift shop, not have to take a meaty detour requiring pre-planning and a time commitment.)

Please note: I also did not go off on any of this in the car with Tom. In fact, you'll notice there were at least two, possibly three or more sidebar rants that I did not pursue during my Frick rant about the entrance lobby sorcery in the car with Tom. I was a paragon of restraint and mostly staying on topic. 

I concluded my in-the-car diatribe with less of a flourish and more because I thought of a new topic. I said, NaBloPoMo is coming up and this year it will be a challenge because I'm so busy.

Tom replied, well, this trip to the Frick could be a post, but you'd need to make it a little more funny and a little less rant-y. I was like Ha! Says who? First of all, this rant was far shorter than it could have been, you're welcome. 

And secondly, what do i know from funny? I am not comedic! I am beset by vital and important points to ensure are perpetuated for the good of society. This shit is vital.

So. Welcome to National Blog Posting Month.