Reporting on Yoga Pants - (No)NaBloPoMo Day 6

First it was yoga pants that clearly had not just entered or exited a yoga studio. Unspoken rule: the yoga pants were always worn with sneakers, Dansko clogs or possibly Birkenstocks. Period, end of list. Even if everybody was fully aware of the lack of yoga amongst those panted up for it, the pretense was maintained.

Sometimes it's important to maintain pretense. That's what civility generally consists of - not letting your freak flag poke out the eyes of innocent bystanders.

A few weeks ago, I had a sighting of yoga pants, the kind with the shimmer and the see-through panels, worn with regular shoes. The sighting occurred near Chelsea Market and the woman in question was definitely a tourist.

Although I made a mental note of the incident, I didn't think much of it. The perpetrator looked like she came from Des Moines, and, while in Des Moines, had envisioned her "I'm going to look like a New Yorker" outfit.

But today. Today I had another sighting on 6th and 31st, definitely not a tourist. She had a really zealous pair of yoga pants tucked into a pair of army-style black boots with a heel.

I feel like I should report this somewhere.


My mother is currently on high alert for these Spotted Lanternflies and sent me the flier. I wonder if the USDA is also tracking the spread of yoga pants transforming into no-adjective-needed pants. Like how overalls distanced themselves from dairy farming.


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